So this was a project I did back in September. It just go critiqued today. Biggest fault: it raises more questions than it answers. Why do these guys live together?
I looked at it as a funny odd couple sort of thing. The older guy, pushing 100, and the younger cat (relatively speaking), whose a character by all measures. I should have let it breathe a little at the intro instead of sliding right into the nat sound. All in all, I’m happy with my first crack at this style of storytelling.
To recap what I ‘shoulda’ done:
*Open with Magnus talking, or with some extended fade-in, silent.
*Focus on just one of the characters, namely Magnus and explain his plight (even though it was not a good choice for a 1-minute piece)
*Show more of the apartment, or at least a shot of the front of the building.
Good luck Mr. Saethre.